I Never Intended To Miss Him This Much...

As much as I wanted to act like I am okay - fearing the incessant judgement and ridicule of people, depression took its toll on me and I guess that there is no way out of this state than admitting that I badly miss Jungsu.

Recently, I've been feeling a lot of stress because Super Show 4 has kicked off and up to this moment, there are only four countries confirmed for the show. Philippines is not in the list and it freaking drives me crazy to think of the possibility that my country may not get to enjoy this wonderful event.

Furthermore, the first day of SS4 in Seoul got me blank when Jungsu announced that he'll be entering the army next year. This was supported by some Taiwan news (and I don't know how they confirmed it) stating that the leader will most likely be joining the concert tour until April only.

It drove me insane because if that is true, we're left with five months; and with the uncertainty of SS4 happening in my country, I feel like I'm running out of time.

The way I feel right now is no joke. Actually, I have been telling myself for quite some time now that it is no longer healthy to stan the leader like this. But apparently, there's really no way out. Every time I try to ruin the reputation Jungsu had implanted on my mind from the year I made him my bias up to this moment, more and more reasons materialize in my heart to keep on holding on.

And now I'm missing him more than ever. It has been 9 months since I saw him and held his hand at the concert. I want that to happen again. I want to see him performing live, dancing in the stage, having fun, smiling brightly, and looking around the whole Araneta for his fans...

I want him to come again to Manila. :'(

Nine months. Yes, it has only been nine months and I'm feeling this nostalgic. I wonder how it would feel if he has to serve the army for two years. Experiencing it from Kangin and Heechul, it could probably be easy but I could never be sure when it's about Jungsu.

People may assume I'm crazy but I don't know. I just wish I could laugh it all off. But yeah, I just need to see him again.

Lee Sungmin's Solo for SS4: 물들어 (Stained) Lyrics

물들어 (original by: BMK)

Lee Sungmin's Solo for SS4

Meori-e eonjeun neoui son

Naneun ijeul suga eobseoseo

nae apeun gaseumeul neoui

iksukhameuro dasi kamsa jwoyahae

na-ege neoui son-i daheun hu

naneun jeomjeom muldeureo

neoui saekeuro neoui iksukhameuro

nareul modu beorigo..

Muldeuro... Neoui sarang an-e naneun

muldeuro... Beoseonal su eobneun neoui sarange

nareul modu beorigo

keojyeoman ganeun neoui sarangane naneun ije

son kkeuteuro pagowa mokeul seuchin sangcheoro

simjang ane meomulmyeo naneun ije neoege

muldeuro... neoui sarang ane naneun

muldeuro.. Beoseonal su eobneun neoui sarange

nareul modu beorigo

keojyeoman ganeun neoui sarangane naneun ije... muldeuro

The song was cut so the second stanza wasn't sung by Sungmin. ^^ As how I understood it, it's a song for a girl who he loves and that he's willing to give up everything just to have that love. LOL. I'm gonna get bricked with what I'm thinking. ^^

Captivating Magic of Lee Sungmin's Music

I have always believed that music needs no language. The message it speaks of depends entirely on the melody and the ability of the singer to be relied. And with Sungmin's solo for SS4 Seoul last night, I was given another proof that music needs no barrier to touch the hearts of those who listen.

credits: eshm104 @ youtube

As one comment have put it on Youtube, Sungmin isn't the most powerful singer in Super Junior. With the presence of KRY, his voice will most likely be in the supporting most of the time. But when he is put on the spotlight, he owns the stage with his ballad songs.

And the song... I couldn't understand the meaning as I don't know Korean that much. But Sungmin's voice and the way he interpreted the lovely song is enough to make me realize that it has touched my heart already, even before I knew it.

The capability of Lee Sungmin to justify any song is indescribable. Not just his voice and the melody, but his eyes also show true passion which no words could ever describe. Though he's a very private person, his glistening eyes give us all a glimpse of his soul - passionate, reserved, and very emotional.

I guess that's what make Sungmin stand out. He pours out everything he has in every song he sings. He adds color to it. He makes it more beautiful. And admit it or not, as you listen to the song, there's this moment when you closed your eyes to feel the overflowing emotions his music puts you on. 

I never thought that his solo would be the first one I would review, considering all the tears I've shed on Zhoumi's part. But I guess it's okay. Sungmin is in Super Junior, and no one comes ahead of the others when we're talking about the group.

Going back... Sungmin really doesn't have a powerful voice compared to KRY's. But you see, he has his own magic to captivate us all. And you can never say no to it.

I'd Give Anything to Have SS4 Manila

I would never be able to transcribe into an article whatever I am feeling right now. Excited? Proud? Happy? In-love? No. It's more than that; even more than what  supercalifragilisticexpialidocious could mean.

Super Show 4 is beyond words.

The boys started world domination right. 7 out of 10 trending topics WORLDWIDE, how do we make it in an instant? And mind you all, the boys sang in English and did acapella, played a variety of instruments, danced, and made us all hyped up even just through the livestream. (oh well, i didn't use livestreaming coz I can't.).

[I guess I have to make another article for Zhoumi's solo. That meant a whole lot to me.]

I don't know. I just want to see everything live. From the half-naked VCR to Ryeowook's abs... to the glory of Mimi's solo to the loving atmosphere the boys would exude in person. I want to experience it all live again.

And if there'll be no SS4 Manila, I would really be going overseas. No thinking twice. Come what may with money, I will do this.

But then, everybody knows that I'd do anything for a show here. Nothing beats that. But it's another story.

Super Junior has taken another step to prove the world of their mighty existence. It's flawless. Even non-fans would surely admit... The boys did a great job.

And they'll be doing more. :)

We're Getting Closer to the Beginning

It's the start of world domination in a few hours. I was distracting myself with Naruto manga all day but a few tweets from my friends led me back to the excitement that finally, the most anticipated thing is happening soon.

This is just the start of it all. In a few hours, another history will be created and I am more than sure that we are going to get more than what we all expect from them.

There is no turning back, indeed. Super Junior has come a long way to prove their success and we, ELF, are heading to the most precious position - beside them.

People, curse me for taking these things seriously. But really, we all need to ready our knees to kneel before the world's greatest act...

No exaggeration there. See it out for yourself.

Super Show 4: It's About to Begin

Everybody have waited for this: the concert which would measure the greatness of Super Junior around the world. Yes, a world tour is about to commence tonight. Just as how long the line for the opening of Breaking Dawn would be in the US, there'll be four or five times of that in Super Show 4 in Seoul, probably.

Isn't it exciting that after how many months, here we are again, anticipating every week to witness the unimaginable prowess of these boys? Though it sucks to admit that they're down from 13 to 9 (plus 2 with Henry and Zhoumi), nothing can still erase the fact that they are still Super Junior.

credit @siwon407

I, myself, is excited about what will happen. The usual choreography, the usual hype, I want to see it again in probably the largest scale. But come to think of it, I couldn't be sure if that's how I really feel.

I don't want to be certain and I don't want to be right, but the beginning of Super Show 4 might also be the start of another inevitable truth that's happening - the long-term hiatus. It is not a secret that there are talks among fans that this could be the last Super Show before everyone sets for the army. 

And it's not funny.

Jungsu is rumored to enlist on February. I don't think Super Show will be over by that time. Meaning, he has to leave in the middle of the schedule, like Heenim. And I guess it's what I dread the most. Up until now, I couldn't picture out how it will be like without him in SJ.. But yeah, that's another story.

from @beatburgerkorea

But now that we still have time to be together, I hope we all realize how much this Super Show 4 means to the boys. I call forth the attention of the millions of ELF around the world, whose countries will be graced by the presence of these boys...

Let's give them what they deserve - the best.

Come united. Let's all be one. Memorize the fanchants, support the projects, and most importantly, cherish the moments. There may be or may no longer be a next time for all of us. We can never be sure. So let's make the most out of it...

And for the mean time, let the world domination begins.

For SS4 Manila: ALL IN.

This is great risk, if you will all just understand.

Shedding probably hundreds of thousands for something which worth we all know.

I know, PULP meant business. But if they do not, what will that make of us, Philippine ELF? We depend on PULP for SS4. We depend on their ability. We depend on their decision...

so that we may have Super Show 4 Manila.

You know, it's not like we're asking everyone of you to truly spend your fortunes on this.

It's just that this means hard work. I know most fans in the Philippines are students; but still, many are employed.

If we have the money, I guess it'll be okay to spend, right?

This is actually crucial.

Especially with the threat and expenses the soon-unfolding GDA brings. 

But as Philippine ELF, we all know that we should do this TOO.
(Imagine ELFs' sacrifices, haters. IMAGINE.)

I know I sound so self-centered considering the fact that this is Super Junior yet again who we're trying to get to the Philippines but if only you would step into our shoes, you would understand why we're doing everything we can to make it happen again, even for the last time.

We campaign for the success of this SS3 3D to bring them here again. That's a fact. We take all chances. We do all measures. Even uncertain...

Most of the time, we claim that it's because we want to see them. But you know, a part of this is because... 

we want THEM to see US.

And as much as I do not want to sound so nagging and miserable, this is one way of proving SM Entertainment that our boys aren't trashes.. It's not like we're blind. It's not like we cannot see what they're trying to do. 

It is undeniable that SJ is aging, but it doesn't make them any less... 

But their company doesn't see it. 

So it is us who should show them that.

So those in Manila, we've got lots of screenings to visit. Check Ms. Happee's page for it. For those in provinces, you can actually breathe well since there'd be no cancellations even if you wouldn't get it sold out. Nonetheless, bear in mind that if you don't meet the quota, PULP will lose money. And if they don't have money, SS4 will impossible.

That's the formula for the problem we have right now.

Now, it's up to us whether we solve it or we leave it blank.

...

SS4 Manila... I'm Not Giving Up.

According to friends, official news said that there's only gonna be Seoul, Osaka, Taipei, Singapore, US, Europe, and Bangkok for Super Show 4. I had the feeling that that's how it's gonna be at first. The biggest countries. (Though I am curious as to why Malaysia isn't included).

Right now, I do not know what to feel. My heart is hurting because I read no SS4 Manila. I don't want to think that there's not gonna be anyone to do it here anymore. I felt like PULP has gone fed up already.

But I'm losing no hope.

If I'm not wrong, each Super Show is supposed to have 13 stops. That's what they're saying always. And do we really think that the boys will just agree on 7 stops for their last concert (before they go on hiatus)? And do you think SME wouldn't take advantage of the fact that the boys have millions of fans all over the world and that means MONEY?

I'm feeding myself with all consoling thoughts. Otherwise, I'll fly to Singapore with friends and enjoy the last moments I could have with my favorite group.