There are times when my mind would be blocked. As much as I would want to create a nice, decent post for this blog, I couldn’t – because everything’s too random. And tears are consistently blocking my eyes, so I couldn’t see the computer monitor clearly.
Well, how long has it been since I’ve felt this way? uhm.. I have to rephrase it… HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN SINCE I STARTED FEELING THIS WAY? I don’t know. Chocolate syndrome just wouldn’t let me feel better… Because there’s no one to direct to.
This is the time when I need Super Junior the most. But this is the first time that they couldn’t do anything. I’ve been watching videos from Youtube since 3 in the afternoon, and it’s already turning midnight, but nothing’s changed yet.
Sorry if I have to post this here. This is so much of my emotional side. But this heartache’s killing me. Well, I never really thought it would hurt this much. Even Super Junior couldn’t save me from the pain. And it is a shame for me to admit it. Because as I consider these Korean boys as my life, I have forgotten that my ‘actual’ life is gone.
But I don’t regret. And I wouldn’t regret, ever. It might hurt, but I know I’ll get pass through it. Because after all, Super Junior’s still here. They’re still with me. And if there is one thing I would never lose, it will be them. Because as an ELF, the boys and I are one.
I don’t know how to end. Does this post made sense? I’m sorry if it didn’t. I just have to find ways to release my emotions. I don’t want to sleep with a heavy heart. Sorry for being too emotional, dearies. I’ll get by just fine.
Just give me time.
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