Sorry :’(

This morning, I was so overwhelmed by the news saying that the boys will be having a one-week vacation from everything. Some are going to Italy while one is coming to the U.S.

Very dreamy. Very real. It feels great to realize that amidst the release of Wookie and Beige’s MV, SHINee’s MV Teaser and BEAST’s MV, the fact that the boys I love will be taking a break from everything topped everything else.

Simple it is, the joy of my boys will always comes first.

I should be really happy but now, I feel intense guilt.

Because the trip, the vacation – it was supposed to be a secret. It was supposed to be private. It was supposed to be just among them and the company.

But I spazzed like crazy about it. But I retweeted most tweets about it. I reblogged posts on tumblr. And I talked to people about something that shouldn’t be spilled.

Getting their secret revealed is not actually a big issue to me. It is the fact that I have failed to protect their interests and privacy which hurts me the most. I got too excited that I didn’t realize that Super Junior is known worldwide. It’s not like they can roam around the streets of Europe and America without being noticed.

And being noticed means everything’s gonna know about it. And everybody knowing about it means NO VACATION AT ALL.

They need time to be themselves. They need all the rest they can get to get back to what they really are, to how they really are. And only A REAL VACATION can give that.

Aish. Right now, I just want to say sorry, especially to Jungsoo and Hyukjae. I just want to let them know how it pains me that they were pissed off. I just want to tell them that next time, I’ll be more sensitive.

정수 오빠또 혁재 오빠… 너무 너무 미안해… 사랑해… 영원한 사랑할께..

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