Goodbye, Geng. `Til We Meet Again…

There will really come a time when no matter how much you hoped for something to happen, it will never do. And you are left with no option but to accept the fact that you lose the game.

It hurts, especially when it is the only thing you’ve ever wanted. You break down, lose hope, and little by little, you lose faith.

Right now, it’s how I feel. I don’t know which to believe anymore. I got lost in all these controversies when all I want to do is to find a way to get him back to us.

But though it’s hardest to admit this, I think we’ve lost him for now. Much to my dismay, it is he who had cut the ties. Much to my despair, I don’t think he’s ever coming back.

I know this is where this leads. Sooner or later, we’re gonna hear the most dreaded statements, the most feared decision; sooner or later, losing him will be official.

Coz though right now, he’s still ours in terms of contract, his heart and mind is no longer with us – well technically, that’s how it seems to be.

Because he’s decided to leave. It’s the reason for this concert. He’s working hard to buy his freedom back.

Yes, it’s disappointing to see him do that. I have promised to believe and yet, this is what’s happening. Yes it sucks but it is his decision. And the only thing I can do is to accept it. After all, it is his life – not mine.

This news – I knew of this on the eve of my birthday, and imagine the pain.Nothing could ever be more depressing than that. I tried my hardest not to think about it, but it’s bothersome that I almost gave up.

But when I read the news about him wanting his brothers to come to his solo concert and that they have given him their blessings, I suddenly see the light. I came to my senses and I know I made the right decision to believe.

If it’s true that he went back to Korea, I think I know his purpose now. He must have met his brothers, and talked things through. I guessed they settled everything already and that is the reason for this conclusion I have come up with:

I’M LETTING GO BUT THERE IS NO WAY I’LL STOP BELIEVING.

It might be hard but now, I understand that it’s just a matter of time. If I don’t do this now and I continue denying the truth, I’ll just prolong the pain and suffering that is killing me each day.

I promised to believe and forever, I’ll do. But yes, I’m letting him go. We’re left with twelve but it doesn’t make much difference. Because though there’s only ten left plus another two, I still see fifteen. Because in my heart, that’s how it’ll forever be.

I wish faith is enough to heal all wounds, and then there’s gonna be fifteen of them again – performing the most beautiful songs, fulfilling their promise of covering the whole planet with Sapphire Blue.

Soon, I’ll see them again, hands in hands as brothers, as one family.

Maybe not now… Maybe not anymore on this lifetime. But if not on Earth, then maybe I will… in heaven.

For now, Goodbye Geng… Until we meet again…

Bottomline is… Super Junior.

There is no better way in procuring success than starting there – right at the lowest.

We tend to think a lot like were always at the lowest point of our lives. But what we fail to realize is that it is a part of this one whole rollercoaster ride. It is part of the adventure. It is part of the challenge.

Everyone, we experience to be at the lowest so we may know how it feels to be there. God allows us to feel the depression and pain so we may not let others feel such way when we start to move forward and step up.

We cannot be masters unless we know how it feels to be servants. So if you think you’re at the bottom point of everything, serve your life well while you’re there. For now, your life is your master. But do not worry, do not fear. God has better plans. Just keep in mind that whatever that happens to you right at this very moment, and all the things that follow, are mere preparations for something a lot greater.

Remember what Jamie Sullivan said? God has bigger plans for her, than what she has for herself. Yes, that applies to us too.

Because after all, you are not meant to be forever at the bottom. You are in a cycle so you have the chance to be at the top.

Right now, I feel that way. But I thought of plans to counteract the depression. I indulge myself on what I want, on what I like. Not necessarily things that make me spend money, but things that actually put a smile on my face just when I thought that nothing else could ever do so.

I’m indulging myself with Super Junior.  And I am telling you, things are becoming a lot easier now.

Happy 24th Birthday, Eternal Maknae ♥

credits: kwan701js @ youtube

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WOOKIE ♥

I know it’s kinda late but my dear eternal maknae, it’s better late than never.

Ryeowook oppa… I’m just so happy to have you as part of my daily existence. Thank you for the wonderful voice you’ve constantly been sharing to us.

I still can’t forget the way you stared at me for like a few seconds when you were still here in Manila. Thank you for adding to that night’s wonder.

Please take good care of yourself, oppa. Please continue being the innocent Kim Ryeowook that we all love. :)

Nomu nomu saranghae, oppa…  Saengil Chukhahamnida ♥

Super Show 3 is On. ♥

IT’S GONNA HAPPEN.

We’ve been waiting for this, right? We’ve been praying so hard for this. We couldn’t get enough of SS2, so here is SS3.

February 26, 2011 | Araneta Coliseum

It’s according to Ms. Happee Sy. Bash me not here.

I’m still in awe. I can’t believe that it’s gonna happen soon, and I’m gonna see them once again. For the second time, my life’s gonna change. For the second time, I’m gonna die and live again.

However, as I have stated in my tumblr account, please do cooperate Philippine ELF. Enough of those stupid fan wars. It’s bringing us to nothing. I’ve been so wanting to say this and I know I have said enough.

For once, people.. For once, and beyond.

Let’s unite for Super Junior.

Let’s all be the persons we’ve been telling ourselves that we are.

For Super Junior. For the Sapphire Blue World.

According to news, ticket reservations will happen on October and please do not believe that the SVIP tickets will cost Php15,000. Because as Ms. Happee said, prices will almost be the same… uh, though there’s a little increase.

So everyone, we still got 4 months left. Do everything you can to have atleast Php 9,000.00… Just to be sure. :)

Okay?

And then we’ll see each other there. ♥

Atleast, Say Goodbye.

Don’t cover your ears, Geng. I know you can hear us. I know you hear our pleas. And I know you know where your heart is… really.

I know you went through a lot. SM wasn’t so nice with you. I understand. But… you left just before 2010 started… And after six months, have you decided already?

You have a new album… Nirvana Renew. Now, you’re free. Now you’re new. But… what about us, Geng? What about us? What about us.

I have nothing against you, doing solo projects. But please, do not be on your own. We’ve been through a lot. Why give up now? Your brothers are waiting for you.Your brothers are loving you up to the very end. Everybody’s waiting for you to come back.

We’re left with no clue. 2010 started without you. We keep on saying, it’s our time again, but the truth is, it’s never completely ours. Because you’re missing.

Yeah. Kangin and Kibum are not with us too. But at least, we know where they are.At least…. nothing.

You put us in a state of knowing nothing. Do we need not to know? Aren’t we worthy enough to know what’s happening?

Okay, let’s compromise.

I’ve said before that I’m letting you go if that’s what you want. But please, don’t take us by surprise. Atleast, say goodbye.

T_T