I’ll Forever Succumb.

Credits to PARKJUNGSU.COM + SJHolic

AUTHENTIC. JOY.

I’m so not okay. Things are starting to stress me, and I am seriously getting fed up with all these issues with my employment and my family.

Nothing really serious, I’m just having some problems with them; which I can’t openly tell here.

But here’s one truth: I’m not okay. I’m tired, up to the point that I get heartburns every day. My breathing was never normal since I get to work. There was even a time that I could no longer walk without support because I’m seeing double.

I remember when I was writing an article, and all of a sudden, my heart started hurting like it’s being crushed. Literally. It was painful. It was difficult. But I couldn’t tell my mom or my dad about it. For the fear that my parents would see, for the fear that they would think that I am complaining, for the fear that they would just disregard.

Life’s terribly unfair with me. I cannot complain. I cannot ask. I cannot cry. I cannot even prioritize myself. I’ve been given a big responsibility though I am not yet ready. In my shoulders, I carry the whole future of my family.

One mistake, we all suffer.

Yeah. Angst as it is. Sorry. It is difficult.

But one smile, one word, one song, from the angel, and everything’s fine. You know what he does to me. You know how he makes things better, how he makes things work.

I guess I have to make the picture above my phone wallpaper. It does miracles to me. That authentic smile, it reminds me that no matter how difficult times may be, I can still smile.

Because it’s one gift that I can do. It is one thing that I should forever be proud of. It is the only ability no one can criticize me for. Because it is my lone defense.

Park Jungsoo.

He is my only strength now. Free of charge. Always there. Never failing me.

With his smile as his weapon, I’ll forever succumb.