Not many paid attention but there are some people who noticed that I actually closed this blog. It was an impulsive decision triggered by something that hurt my ego as a fan. I wouldn’t want to dwell on it anymore since it’s done and I’m finally being convinced of the possible excuses why it happened; so once again, here I am, enjoying the space I have especially intended for me and my angels.
It is not a secret that Super Junior had won the Disk Daesang in the recently concluded Golden Disk Awards in Osaka; and this is something that we’ve all been praying for. I’ve seen how each one of us exerted effort to buy the albums, vote on polls, and campaign for this group’s popularity. Well, obviously it paid off. We won.
Yes, I used the term ‘we’ because this is a combined effort of Super Junior and ELF. As we usually say, it is only on each other that we depend on, and I think we have once again proven the world that as long as we have each other, we can conquer everything.
There were no livestreaming and my internet was fucked up that night so I couldn’t properly spazz but I think it will be underrated to say that I trembled, I got anxious, I got nervous, and I got excited about the results. Although I was kinda confident that they will win, I couldn’t remove the possibility of result manipulations again. We all know the story, and before you accuse me of bashing other groups, I am telling you that I am merely stating the truth.
When I knew that they won, I suddenly remembered myself last year. I was crying, mumbling sorry to myself, hoping that the wind would deliver my sincere apologies to Super Junior members who I know were terribly disappointed. That night, I looked for someone to blame and I ended up blaming myself and the others for not trying hard enough. It was absurd, of course, but I took this fandom in a very serious manner – so serious that their disappointments have become my disappointments too. Even double.
Then I wrote an article entitled Sorry, SJ, Sorry. An excerpt from it circulated around the internet and this is what it said:
Jungsoo wanted to be congratulated by the end of the year.
This is Heechul’s birthday wish.
It could’ve been a good compensation when Yesung didn’t win a Digital Bonsang.
And yes guys, this could have been the best keepsake we can give Jungsu and Heechul before they enter the army.
But we couldn’t.
And you know what makes me cry harder?
It’s the fact that this would be the best news to give Kangin.
This could’ve been the best gift to welcome Kibum back.
And this could be the best reason to make Hangeng come back.
But now, as I reread it, I felt accomplished. I know that the Disk Daesang for 2010 was ours. It was returned to us, actually, in a form of a simple award-giving ceremony held on early 2011. But still, it felt different since our boys were announced as winners on the exact date that the awards were given.
And you know what I’m thinking?
Jungsu can now enter the army without any regrets.
This is something that could make Heenim prouder even when in service.
This is the best gift to welcome Kangin back home with.
This is the greatest reminder that Super Junior – along with Kibum and Hangeng – still exists.
And yes, this is the strongest proof that Super Junior, who are continuously being dragged down by different forces, is still standing strong.
Because at the end of the day, Super Junior will always be the group that conquered the world.
On his tweet, the leader said that if there is one thing that they do not know, it is ‘breaking up’; and ELF do not know it as well…
…Because we, together, define forever.