One Time Big Time Rant (A NOVEL)

Just want to let out something RANT-WORTHY again. (Gotta let this out even if I'm working coz I'm freaking pissed off still, like that.)

This morning, I woke up to a video on Facebook posted by a famous personality. In the video, they were in a car. It was evening and I think they're going around Myeongdong (?). Then a Korean woman who's in the scene called Kim Heechul. When the almighty Heenim picked up the phone, she told him that there are Filipina fans who came to Korea who wanted to talk to him. I couldn't understand Heenim's reply except 'JINJJA' then the girl apparently said that the fans would just like to say  'HEENIM, HI!' so he agreed.

I was literally spazzing coz it felt so perfect waking up to a Kim Heechul speaking in English. He's been in service for five months already and hearing his voice (aside from his radio stints) somehow eases the longing.

To cut the story short, I am happy...

...until I learned that the 'FIXED' on the video is for the fact that it was a second video, and the first video uploaded actually EXPOSED the cellphone number of the Space Big Star.

TRUTH: My first reaction was to know the number. A friend gave it to me, then. I'm not gonna be hypocrite and tell you that I wasn't thrilled. Of course, I WILL BE THRILLED. But believe me or not, I no longer feel happy having it.

I felt that way when I saw Tiff's tweet. Obviously, it was HEENIM who she was referring to. I honestly felt guilty that I even asked for it. Heenim is still a person, after all, and he values privacy even when he's an idol, especially that he's in service.

Please don't start me with issues of double standards. I got his number, yes. But I find no use with it. As if I can call him? As if I can send him a message? It's not like I can brag about it as well - and hell no, I won't brag about it. My annoyance lies on the fact that in the video, my country was mentioned. It was just... ugh. First, it's the Kyochon Filming. Now, this? And worse, HEENIM?! Someone humor me!


I know you all see where I'm coming from. I share the same sentiments with other Filipino fans who are irritated with the incident. During SS3 Manila, many people actually exerted SO MUCH effort to prove this princess how much the country loves him. And obviously, it was a success. Heenim loved the Philippines - THAT'S A FACT. He wasn't drunk when he tweeted that he 'fxxin' loves Manila. He really enjoyed being the royalty and I could justify my claims with proofs...

...which I won't reveal.

Because I know that there are things that are supposed to be kept as secrets.


I talked to Tiff this morning after I learned of the issue. She was annoyed, and no, you wouldn't want to annoy her. We shared the same sentiments and our minds were fucked up with the fact that there was an apology issued (but not directly) yet the same video (although fixed) was re-uploaded. Now talk about the purpose of the apology being defied.

Heechul-Petals' founder told me that Heenim's calmed down now. But even she, herself, cannot be assured that things are okay. I viewed HP's tweets and learned that Heenim actually contacted the site and that his phone's off and he couldn't have his number replaced yet since he has a contract with iPhone for two years. And that just blew me all off.

I remembered Ate Chichi's tweet. The problem with fans nowadays is that everyone wants to be ahead of everyone else. That's bullshit. We already had the freaking story of Kyochon's filming here. Now we have this number-exposing incident... and worse, it's Heechul that's involved.

Until now, I still feel like crying. Yes, I enjoyed the video coz I enjoyed hearing him speak in English but it creeps me whenever I realize that he is apparently being used for popularity purposes. It's unfair. A famous personality, of all people, should understand how much privacy means to another famous personality. This could've passed if things have been dealt with properly.

At this very moment, I am rummaging my mind for some possible and honest reasons why I should stop getting annoyed. I thought of possibly, she didn't notice that the number was actually flashed before the camera and she just realized it when the video was on Youtube and spreading like wildfire already. I want to give her that benefit of the doubt. If I were her, I would also document my conversation, honestly.

But again, the thing is, she apologized but she re-uploaded the video. What exactly is the reason for that?

My head hurts. Everybody knows that I am sensitive when it comes to Heechul. It's hard to explain. Even if I'm stanning on Jungsu, Heenim's opinions and perceptions toward things matters more than anything else to me when it comes to this fandom.

As this day ends, I want to convince myself that things are okay now, even if I am still tremendously annoyed. But then I can't help but think that it's not. Tiff said that she wishes that the girl who uploaded the video would have the decency to apologize to Heenim personally, since she got the number already and she's friends with one friend of Heenim (who I believe is pissed off right now as well - just an assumption coz Heenim, of course, might confront her since she's the bridge). And I agree, and together, we hope that he will be nice and he will forgive her...

Coz I really don't want to get nervous anymore. The least thing I want to see right now is a pissed-off Kim Heechul. It's fucking scary, even if I don't know him personally. Remember the Shanghai incident? Everyone thought Heenim was fine because Jia said so, but later on, he tweeted (and then later on delete) something like 'FUCK SCAR! I'M NOT COOL!'. I don't want a second round of the fear I felt that time.

I wish this teaches us all a lesson. Discipline is one thing that attracts an idol. Believe me. Heechul values that a lot.

***

And to those who keeps on badmouthing Tiff. I'm not gonna defend her that much since I bet she can handle you all on her own, but I just want to tell you one thing. She never spread useless rumors about Heenim. She has her ways of contacting the idol and Heenim really has contacts with her and the site. And for those who doesn't know... She is the one who gave the idol the title SPACE BIG STAR. It was a project. And all these star-buying-for-idol projects? It was her, along with HP, that started it.

Also, she's not your 'delusional fangirl'. She's actually married, so there's no basis about your accuses. =) Thank you very much. :)