I was too taken away by my emotions last night. The cusses and the previous blog post would seriously be a proof. Now I’m ashamed of what I have done but I will never, ever be regretful. Because I know that last night, it was all I ever wanted.
Right now, I am still not fine. Heart hurts again and I cannot tell anyone. Of course, this truth remains a secret to my parents, still. I have no plans of telling.
This post, nevertheless, is an apology to those who have been disappointed by my stupidities. To Des and Chena who I was talking to while the thing happened, I’m really, really sorry. Until now, the shame lives on. For the whole day, I was just thinking of how to apologize, especially to Chena who, I think, was extremely annoyed.
Good thing this Friday came. Good thing God didn’t give me what I wanted. Good thing I was with great people a while ago. Good thing I got to get back to myself.
I went back to UE Caloocan. Everything came back to me in an instant. The acceptance, the love and the concern of the people for me there is still evident. A part of my life and a major part of my character was honed there. I guess that part of me will never ever leave. I guess UE will always be my sanctuary.
Then I went to Makati to visit my former officemates. When I arrived, it is my ex-boss who first saw me. I was really taken aback when she hugged and kissed me cheek-to-cheek. For a second, I thought if I really did the right decision of leaving the office. Then when I entered the office, it was really the coolest thing ever that happened to me in that place. Though they were busy, they took the time to chat with me, even my gorgeous boss. And once again, I felt like ‘yeah, many people still love me.’
Afterwards, I met up with Ate Charm and Kuya Jerry. A new acquaintance, David, came too. They skipped a few hours from work to be with me. We ate at a nearby restaurant and truth is, time flew so fast that we didn’t notice they’re out of the office for almost three hours. It was really fun. It was the first time bonding with Ate Charm and I heard many stories and revelations.
Ate Charm is one of the sweetest and coolest person I’ve ever known while Kuya Jerry is one of the bulliest. I love them both, and the same thing goes with the rest of X Crew. Thank you to the both of you. See you the soonest. Can’t really wait for March.
Today is an eye-opener for me. As I was walking to the bus stop after Kuya Jerry and I parted ways, I started realizing that my world should not stop because I fail with family. Because at the end of the day, there are people who still care. There are people who want me around. There are still people who understand.