As I was lurking in Twitter, I saw the announcement of Super Junior M performing for a Chinese event. Boy, it excites me! Seeing them back is like an answered prayer – another miracle.
But despite the excitement, I have to admit that something does not feel so right. Something doesn’t seem to be in its place. It’s as if something missing. Then I thought, it’s not something. It’s actually someone – HANGENG.
I wonder how it feels. I wonder how Geng is right now. It’s quite impossible that he wouldn’t hear about the news of his group’s comeback (I will never put former on it). I want to know how he feels about this. Is he happy? Is he equally excited? Or is he indifferent?
Seriously, just a thought of Geng and the old SJ-M activates my tear glands. It has not been a secret that I miss Geng so much and that I so want him back, right? So yeah, it hurts to realize that my most loved Chinese group is coming back without their leader.
Does it hurt? Does Geng feels pain seeing SJ M in a better and brighter state, but incomplete? Does Geng, himself, hopes as well that they get to perform together again, like how they used to do before?
It must hurt a lot. It must make the Chinese prince so nostalgic. It should, because it actually does… to me.
Yes. I wish I could express into words the way I feel right now. I must admit that I’ve gotten used to seeing Geng without Super Junior and that I have let him go already. But I never thought that seeing SJ M without him would be another history.
Probably because he’s the leader.
Now, I’m left with the question: Who’ll be the next SJ M leader? Who will hold the mic for Henry when the maknae plays the violing while singing? Who will whisper the Korean translations of Mandarin words to Hae’s ears when he can’t understand what the MCs are saying? Who will cover Kyuhyun when he’s eating the lunch of a variety show’s host? Who will dance the buttdance and all other cute dances with Ryeowook? And finally, who will be the one person to cuddle Siwon for fanservice?
At the moment, I’m tearing up. I remembered when Siwon and Geng guested in a Chinese variety show. Siwon gave a message to Geng which made them both cry so much. I wish to see it again. But when? All I have in my mind right now is the question: Where is the Geng who Siwon wishes to never give up?
I wonder who will replace Geng, but I want to believe that no one will. Really. Not that I don’t believe on the ability of others but as much as possible, I don’t want them to get a new leader. They can exist without one anyway.
I wish they reserve that place for Geng… Just in case he decides to come back.