Monday, July 12, 2010

You’re All Making Me Cry.

I don’t want to think about it but why do all of you have to talk about it? Geez. I thought we’re over this. But… Why can’t we seem to accept the fact that we’re all mortals here… and vulnerable.
I don’t blame you, anyway. Maybe, I’m just so much in-denial.
Guys. I’m not controlling you, and you have all the freedom to do whatever you like and think of whatever you want and believe on whatever you ship. But, please, allow me to just burst this out. This is totally making me feel broken and I really, really can’t take it anymore.
Hae’s ring and phone call. Hyuk’s break-up issues. Kyuhyun’s and Wookie’s hand signals. Jungsoo’s love mission – I’ve been trying so hard not to think about it because it hurts. It fucking hurts.
I’ve said it before that it does. And no matter how much I try to deny, it’s still really making me feel the pain of being JUST a fan. Only a fan. Nothing more, nothing less, nothing else.
True. I am just a fan girl who does not stand even the slightest chance on any of them, especially to Jungsoo. I’m not even Korean, to begin with. That’s why it really is painful to see this all happening.
But I can’t always remain on my fantasy. No matter how much I look up to them as angels, they are still vulnerable and prone to a disease called LOVEThey’re still humans and they all have emotions. After all, they’re not getting any younger.Jungsoo’s 28 already. None of the Super Junior members are on their teens.It’s about time that they gets into something serious.
Geez. You guys are seriously making me cry. Because everytime I see pictures posted on my dash, and I realize the possibilities, I get jealous and I freak out. I know I’m not yet ready to let go of the boys just like that. They’re my babies. It’s never gonna be easy. ;____;


Let me make it clear though, NOTHING IS CONFIRMED. Though all the signs are directing to the confirmation of all these assumptions. But… I don’t know, I don’t want to believe any of it yet. I’m still unprepared. I don’t want to get caught off guard.
Aisssh. I wonder why this has to be this hard. I have long convinced that I am just a fan but I still got my hopes high. Wrong move, I know. Got myself too indulged on this. But, no regrets. I SWEAR.
Sorry for the rants. Just can’t take it anymore. But here’s one fact to get straight: Not everything they do on their No Other performances are because they are up for some secret love missions. Geez. Guys, the song is a sweet one, and it’s dedicated to us. So, I advice that we believe on this first…
And then we get ourselves ready for the truth. ;_____;
Sorry, this is the hardest thing to say ever. Sorry for being so random and inconsistent. I just love them so much. :(

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